Football transfer rumours: David Villa to Manchester United?

Mon, Jun 15, 2009

Football Gossip and Transfer Rumours


Today’s no-nonsense rumours are brought to you by Bread’n'Spread®

Just like everyone else in the world with half a functioning brain cell, pulsating weakly, the Rumour Mill’s spirit has been totally crushed by all these reports of the myriad ways Manchester United are going to spend that £80m. So we’re so very sorry about much of the following. But what can you do?

Manchester United will make a £45m bid for Real Madrid and Barcelona target David Villa, who told Chelsea last week he wanted to stay in Spain. One way or another, someone’s going to end up looking daft when it all comes down.

Zinedine Zidane is trying to convince Franck Ribéry to snub Manchester United and join Real Madrid, it says here. Except he’s not, is he? He’s just trying to convince him to join Real Madrid. That’s all.

Now Cristiano Ronaldo’s gone, it’s the Carlos Tevez transfer that’s boring the apertures off us. Manchester City and Liverpool are in for him, plus one other unnamed side on the continent – Myllykosken Pallo –47 is our guess – but let’s face it, he’ll probably re-sign for Manchester United. Even though he’s categorically stated that he won’t. This story has WASTE OF TIME running through it like a stick of rock.

Now Cristiano Ronaldo’s gone, it’s the Glen Johnson transfer that’s boring the apertures off us. It looks like he’s off to Chelsea, who have already ruined his career once. Liverpool and Manchester City can whistle.

Paul Robinson, who wowed the Premier League last season as part of West Bromwich Albion’s amazing famous back four alongside Curly, Larry and Moe, wants to follow Tony Mowbray to Celtic. Borja Valero and Marc-Antoine Fortuné could also follow this route, as Gordon Strachan’s reputation grows by the day.

Meanwhile Aidy Boothroyd, 2006’s Mr Future O’Football, is in the running for the West Bromwich Albion job when Mowbray officially does one. Have these people not suffered enough?

Gary McAllister wants to return to Motherwell. “They are my club,” he Sheringhamed yesterday, covering his Leeds United tattoo with one hand, and whipping off his Liverpool rosette.

Tottenham Hotspur want Luca Toni. You can’t quite put your finger on what’s going to go wrong here, can you, but the sense is there alright.

And Manchester United this, Manchester United that, Manchester United the other.

Have your say on whom Manchester United should/should not buy below

guardian.co.uk © Guardian News & Media Limited 2009 | Use of this content is subject to our Terms & Conditions | More Feeds

You might also find this interesting:

  1. Football transfer rumours: David Villa to choose between Chelsea and Real Madrid this week
  2. Football transfer rumours: Chelsea chase Franck Ribéry, David Villa, Andrea Pirlo and Emmanuel Adebayor
  3. Football transfer rumours: Alexander Hleb to Aston Villa?
  4. Transfer Rumors (08 May 09): Manchester City not interested in Real’s Raul, Bayern’s Ribery prefers Real over Manchester United, Carew wants Norway teammate Hangeland at Villa, and more
  5. Transfer Rumors (11 Jun 09): Valencia reject Chelsea bid for Madrid-bound Villa, Manchester United interested in former target Robben, Barcelona inquire about Liverpool’s Benayoun, and more

Leave a Reply